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Why Resolutions Collapse for Powerful Women and What Actually Works Instead

Why what worked before no longer reaches what's emerging now

Every January, millions of women repeat the same ritual.

We pull out fresh journals. We download new planners. We commit to finally being the version of ourselves we've been trying to become.

And by February? Most of those goals are gathering dust.

The stats are sobering: roughly 80-90% of New Year's resolutions are abandoned within weeks or months.

But here's what nobody tells you, especially if you're a woman over 50 who's already accomplished more than most people dream of:

The problem isn't your willpower. It's your operating system.

The Goal-Setting Lie We've All Been Sold

You've probably heard the story about about Harvard graduates that wrote down their goals and later out-earned and produced everyone else… Well, Harvard confirmed they never did a study on goal setting like that.

The problem is this is a story that has now become the standard by which goal setting is matched… So, if this is a myth, then the question becomes: “Why do some women seem to move forward effortlessly while others, just as capable, just as committed stay stuck?”

Well here’s the rub, goal-setting works when tasks are clear, conditions are stable, and your identity is already in alignment with the outcome you want.

Which means if you're setting goals from an outdated version of yourself, one shaped by decades of managing life instead of creating it, those goals will quietly contract to fit your outdated identity.

The Default Settings You Never Chose

After decades of working with powerful women, I've seen the same pattern play out again and again.

Women don't fail because they lack ambition.

They fail because they're still living by default instead of design, operating from settings that were programmed into them decades ago.

These default settings were installed by a system that socialized women to believe:

  • Pleasing others matters more than honoring yourself

  • Being needed is safer than being powerful

  • Your worth comes from what you do, not who you are

  • Taking up space requires permission and apology

Research on gender socialization shows that women internalize narrower bands of "acceptable ambition" without even realizing it.

We've been conditioned to aim lower than our true capacity. To manage our lives instead of creating them. To pursue achievement while our deepest potential remains dormant.

This is why so many accomplished women feel that quiet ache for more, even after success.

That ache isn't dissatisfaction. It's your divine design pressing against default programming that no longer fits.

Age with Power Advantage

  • You've already lived through enough "fresh starts" to recognize which transformation strategies are temporary performance and which create lasting shift.

  • Your pattern recognition is razor-sharp, you can see where goals will collapse before you even set them.

  • The energy you once spent proving yourself is now available for precise, powerful choices that honor your actual capacity.

  • You've earned the right to refuse the hustle narrative without guilt, explanation, or apology.

  • Your bullshit detector is so finely tuned you can feel misalignment in your body before your mind tries to rationalize it away.

Why Goals Without Identity Are Just Wishful Thinking

Here's what most goal-setting processes miss:

They assume you need better planning. Stronger discipline. Clearer metrics. But after working with ambitious women like you, I can tell you the truth:

Most women aren't struggling with execution. They're struggling with permission.

  • Permission to want what they actually want, not what they think they should want.

  • Permission to trust their own knowing instead of external validation.

  • Permission to stop shrinking their vision to fit someone else's comfort zone.

Traditional goal-setting starts with the question: "What do you want to achieve?"

But for women who've spent decades being socialized to put everyone else first, that question bypasses the deeper work:

What do you need to shift in order to give yourself permission to have what you truly desire?

This is why New Year's resolutions fail at such staggering rates. The goals themselves aren't the problem. It's that they're being built on a foundation of outdated identity.

You can't manifest from a version of yourself that doesn't believe she deserves it.

The FENOM Approach: Vision From Your Future Self

At FENOM University, we don't start with goals.

We start with identity.

Because when you realize your evolutionary path is a shift in your identity, the path forward reveals itself naturally.

Here's how to create a vision for 2026 that actually sticks, not because you're white-knuckling your way through it, but because it's aligned with your evolved identity.

1. Drop Into Your Zone of Power

Before you do anything else, get into your body.

Stand up. Roll your shoulders back. Take a deep breath.

Think about a moment when you felt completely alive, when you were in your creative flow, making an impact, fully expressed.

That's your Zone of Power. That's who you actually are beneath all the conditioning.

You can't create a powerful vision from a contracted state of BEing. You have to tap into the higher-version of self to access the state of power that already knows how to create.

Feel into her. Notice how she stands. How she breathes. The quality of her presence.

This is where real visioning begins. It begins with you feeling your own power.

2. Give Yourself Permission to Want More

From this resourced place, ask yourself:

If I wasn't worried about what other people would think… If I trusted that I'm capable of creating anything I truly desire… If I knew I couldn't fail… What would I let myself want?

Don't censor it. Don't make it "reasonable."

The reason so many women aim lower than their capacity isn't lack of ambition, it's decades of being punished for wanting too much.

Your job right now is to override that programming.

What lights you up? What makes you feel electric just thinking about it?

Love? Freedom? Impact? Prosperity? Creative expression? Deep intimacy?

Let yourself feel the full scope of your desire without apologizing for it.

3. Connect to the Feeling, Not Just the Outcome

This is where most vision work falls apart.

People make lists of what they want to have or do, but they skip the most important part:

What do you feel about what you want?

Close your eyes and imagine it's December 2026.

Something significant has shifted in your life. You're surrounded by people who celebrate you. You feel different, lighter, more powerful, more free.

From inside that future, ask yourself:

  • What does my life feel like now?

  • What am I most proud of in myself?

  • How do I move through my day differently?

  • What do I believe about myself that I didn't believe before?

  • Who have I become?

This isn't visualization. This is identity rehearsal.

You're teaching your nervous system what it feels like to be her, the woman who already has what you desire.

Remember, the sub-conscious mind does not know the difference between what’s real and what’s imagined. It operates on what you feel if real.

4. Identify Where the Energy Is

Now scan everything that came up for you.

What's calling you most strongly right now?

Not what sounds most impressive. Not what you think you should focus on.

What feels hot and ready to fire… what feels like it is pulling you back or pulling you forward?

That's your signal.

You don't need to transform everything at once. You need to follow the energy that's ready to move now.

Choose one or two areas that are fired up and ready to be expressed. The areas where there's excitement, nervousness, or that electric charge of possibility.

That's where your power is asking to be expressed.

5. Name the Identity Shift Required

Here's the game-changer question:

What internal and mental shift would I need to make to naturally create the life I envision?

This is truly not about what you need to do. Who you need to be. It’s always about what you feel… because doing is an expression of BEing.

  • When you embrace the woman who values herself, prosperity follows.

  • When you embrace the woman who trusts her voice, impact happens naturally.

  • When you embrace the woman who expects love, intimacy shows up.

The work isn't forcing outcomes. The work is evolving your identity so the outcomes become inevitable.

Your Power Shift Protocol

  • Look at your current goals and ask: "Is this coming from the woman I've been, or the woman I'm evolving into?" Eliminate anything that feels like you're trying to prove your worth instead of expressing your power.

  • Name one area where you're still people-pleasing or performing. Where you're managing other people's comfort at the expense of your own truth.

  • Identify the decision you've been avoiding because you're waiting for certainty. Choose the one that simultaneously scares and excites you, then take one concrete action this week.

  • Track your energy over the next 30 days, notice when you feel most alive versus when you feel drained, then ruthlessly eliminate what depletes you.

  • Write one identity statement that reflects your power now. (example: "I am a woman who creates from desire, not obligation"). Read it aloud every morning until it rewires your default settings.

What Makes a Year Powerful

The work this year and every new year isn't accumulating more achievements.

It's about stepping into the fullness of who you actually are.

A powerful year isn't measured by your productivity. It's measured by:

  • How aligned you feel with your choices

  • How much you trust yourself to create what you desire

  • How freely you express your authentic power

  • How fully you inhabit your own life

This is why traditional goal setting feels so foreign to you right now.

It's not resistance of goal setting. You know well how to do this from year’s of practice. It's evolution of your identity so that the you connect to the goals from your souls evolution instead of just performance driven doing.

You're not meant to optimize yourself into a better version of who you've been. You’re not here to reinvent the woman you are. You are here to allow that woman to fully emerge into the allness of who you are born to BE.

That's not something you plan.

That's something you allow.

And when you do, everything shifts.

About the Author

Dr. Diva Verdun, the Architect of Ageless Power™ and Fierce Factor Expert, is the founder of FENOM University and the Age with Power™ movement, where she empowers ambitious women to crush it after 50 and rewrite the rules of aging. Through her signature Core 4 Principles of F.I.R.E.™ — Purpose, Passion, Prosperity, and Power — she guides women to ignite their inner brilliance, embody their authentic power, and expand into a life of bold, liberated expression. On the campus of FENOM University, Dr. Diva leads evolutionary experiences, legacy brand training, and deep identity shifts designed to help women rise into their next chapter with unstoppable fire.

Connect with Dr. Diva: WebsiteLinkedinFacebook

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